What Happens When Disability Collides With The System Artwork

When Life Gives You Lemons

We do a bit of Research into handicapped travel issues and provide some solutions. Mobility, Hearing, Sight, Mental issues included. so far our episodes have included some information on Ataxia, Cerebral Palsy, Deafness, Dancing Sickness, Gulf War Syndrome, Long Covid and Wheelchairs. We are both Disability Advocates and realize there are too many diseases and conditions to cover and try to discuss the most common problems disabled people face and spread some awareness of disabled issues non-disabled people are unaware of.

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When Life Gives You Lemons

What Happens When Disability Collides With The System

March 11, 2026 • Kevin & Palmi Henry • Season 4 • Episode 2

0:00 | 35:01

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A single moment split Danny Williams’ life in two: before the traumatic brain injury and after. What followed wasn’t a neat arc of recovery but years of stubborn iteration—wheelchair to walker to rollator to cane—paired with speech therapy, diet changes, and the hard work of teaching his other hand to write. We sit with Danny as he maps the terrain few see from the outside: how a prognosis can shrink your world, and how agency, second opinions, and daily reps can widen it again.

We get candid about the systems that shape disability. Danny stays in New York because the TBI waiver, Section 8 housing, and utility support make survival possible, yet he faces trade-offs that feel impossible: marriage or medical coverage, a job or essential care. He explains the spend-downs, income caps, and cliff effects that keep people poor for staying alive. As a veteran, he threads VA access with private insurance to protect his options, challenging any single gatekeeper’s say over his future. When doctors predicted a bedridden life, he pushed back, reducing 38 medications to five and weighing long-term organ risks against short-term relief.

This conversation is about more than policy; it’s about power. Danny draws a line around his time, his choices, and his body. He rejects the quiet control of others—what to wear, when to eat, how to move—and builds momentum with small wins that add up to autonomy. We also look ahead: where might his skills fit next? He’s eyeing AI security and even robot repair, charting a path that blends practicality with curiosity. If you’ve ever felt defined by a diagnosis or boxed in by red tape, Danny’s story offers a working blueprint: decide what you want, gather the right team, and keep moving, even when the system says stop.

If this resonated, follow the show, share this episode with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help more listeners find these stories. Your feedback shapes what we explore next.

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Opening And Mission

palmi 7:09

Welcome to our podcast when life gives you lemons. I'm Kevin.

Kevin 7:15

And I'm Palmi. We consider ourselves disability advocates and intend to highlight some disability issues and things we find interesting that we frequently encounter when we're out and about. Also, some history on disability that we find interesting. This year we're going to include more of the interviews of the people that the disability affects. We hope you enjoyed it. And I'm Palmi.

Introducing Danny And His TBI Story

palmi 8:14

And today we're gonna interview a gentleman named Danny Williams who's uh suffering from a traumatic brain injury and lives in New York. I'm really looking forward to this, but you know what part I'm really hating? What? Well, everybody from New York seems to have a very annoying accent, and I'm hoping it isn't too horrible. Otherwise I'll just hate him right off the bat.

Kevin 8:54

You're like turn all of our viewers against us.

palmi 8:58

I'm not trying to insult anybody, it's just a fact of life. I've always not gotten along with people because of that accent. Well, and the attitude that goes with it.

Kevin 9:12

Hopefully he doesn't have an accent.

palmi 9:17

Well, without further ado, here comes Mr. Everybody. Sure.

Kevin 9:26

Wow, what a great interview. I learned a lot about TBIs.

palmi 9:30

Learned a lot about TBIs and how they treat somebody on Medicaid in New York City as well.

Kevin 9:39

And how you end up living with it.

palmi 9:43

Yeah. Well, everybody knows it if you're on Medicare no matter what state you're in. You're always in that ground where you can't make too much money or they take it away from you.

Kevin 10:02

It'd be a pretty sudden thing if you just wake up and realize you're disabled.

palmi 10:08

Yeah, I often wonder about that. You know, a lot of people like uh when we talk to uh uh Alexis, you know, once you're born with the disability, you seem to like just that's the way life is you have to adapt to it, but uh to be in other people's shoes and all of a sudden have that disability before them.

Kevin 10:42

Different story.

palmi 10:43

Yeah, I think it's got to be a different mindset altogether.

Kevin 10:47

Yeah.

palmi 10:48

Anyway, thanks very much, Danny. We had a great time talking to you, and we'll see everybody next time.

Kevin 10:55

And we wish you good luck.

palmi 10:58

And what do we always say?

Kevin 11:00

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Yeah, exactly.

Danny 11:09

Okay.

palmi 11:11

Why don't you begin with uh telling everybody else a little bit about yourself?

Danny 11:18

Uh my name is Danny Williams, I'm 64, and I have a TBI. I got the TBI in 1999 when the coach, when the cops, the police, they choked me because they said they didn't have any guns. So they decided they had to choke me. I woke up three days later and I had a TBI.

palmi 11:41

If you don't mind me asking, where do you live? I live in New York. I live in Alberta. I noticed uh a lot of the news clips of Steve New York, they have like a gang of cops that tackle people because there aren't so deep beamekins or I think they don't do that in Texas, but they do it in New York.

Danny 12:05

I I it was me against the cops, and whatever they said was true, and whatever I said wasn't true, so I just left alone.

palmi 12:16

Okay, well, let's get back to your injury here. Obviously, you had way more problems than just cops jumping on you.

Life Before And After The Injury

Danny 12:25

Right. Um, when I got the TBI before the TBI, I was working as a supervisor and I had my own business. And then afterwards, uh what a couple hours later, and well, three days later when I woke up, I was a different person. I had a TBI and I uh I was shaking and all this other stuff, and I didn't really know what had happened, but the doctor told me I you do have a TBI now. So I I've been since 1999 to now been trying to get better, and that's all I've been trying to do.

palmi 13:03

For those of us that are unfamiliar with dreaming for TBIs, what did that involve?

Danny 13:10

It involves traumatic brain injury. Uh, when I got choked, it it's a noxic brain injury or stroke.

palmi 13:17

I don't understand that. Are you talking uh your recovery, physical therapy, mental therapy?

Speaker 2 13:25

Uh I had uh physical therapy, and mainly I did everything myself. I had to change my diet, um I had to learn how to do things differently, I had to learn how to write with my other hand, uh had uh speech therapy for a little while. Uh had everything. I just keep going. I it depends on it depends on you. If you want to say you want to be depressed about what somebody else done to you, you could be depressed, or you could say, I'm gonna change the way that I am, and I'm gonna do things the way that I am now to get what I want. And in my future, I want to own my own business again, and I want to be I ain't gonna be the same person I was, but I can still have the same things I want to have in my future, right? So I have to work on getting better so I can have those things, and that's what I'm doing right now. Good. Stay focused, man. I'm pulling for you.

palmi 14:29

I'm staying focused, I'm pulling for myself. So why is it you choose to live in New York?

Speaker 2 14:40

I choose to live in New York because I'm on a TBI waiver and you get the most in New York State, but uh I'm I'm ready to move, but I don't know uh what will happen if I move to other states and what will I get as a brain injury person. Because right, right. Some places they don't give you as much help as they do here in upstate.

palmi 15:06

I know exactly what you mean because uh I'm a veteran. And some uh states have a lot of disabled veteran benefits, and some have absolutely none. So it's like you know, I really want to move there. Not really, but they give me tax breaks or something, you know. Something I want.

Speaker 2 15:37

Well, I'm a vet too, but I I go to the VA sometimes, and sometimes I also have the insurance, so I use the doctors with the insurance also. So I have two doctors for neurology, two doctors for urology, two doctors. Uh I I see if someone says something wrong that I don't like, I go to the other doctor and see what they say. If they say something I don't like, I go to another doctor. That's what I've been doing since 1999.

palmi 16:06

When you're brutally disabled, that really can't come in handy. Yeah, that automatic second opinion.

Speaker 2 16:15

Well, it it comes in handy if you push for yourself. If you don't push for yourself, then it ain't gonna be handy. I push for myself, and if I don't like what the doctor's saying, because they told me I would be bedridden for the rest of my life, and I'm walking around with a cane now. So I can't listen to them and what they think I'm gonna be for the rest of my life. I gotta say what I want to be for the rest of my life, what I want to do. Because if I don't say it to myself, ain't nobody else gonna say it for me.

palmi 16:47

Now let's talk about your mobility journey for a minute. You said you walk with the king now. For did you walk with the king? Did you always walk with the king?

Rehab, Therapies, And Self-Advocacy

Speaker 2 16:59

No, I was in a wheelchair. Uh then I used a walker, then I used the rollator, then I I graduated to a king. I progressed over over time.

palmi 17:14

That's quite a journey. Uh I have to say I've made that same journey, but in reverse. Well started with the cane, went to roll wager, then went to Wagger, went to wheelchair. For me, yeah, no, that's for just for me, not for you.

Speaker 2 17:35

Well, for me, it it was determined by the doctors and the medication. Sure. So I've been playing with my medication so that I could be better. Right. Uh when when I don't like a certain medication, because I was on 38 medications and I dropped it down to five now. Cool. I really don't want to be in a whole bunch of medication. I want to be on, I want a cure for what's going on with me. I don't want to fix. So if they want to give me a fix, I take it because I'm on a TBR waiver. And they say you have to take your medicine from your doctor, and I take it. But I want to make sure it's the right medicine for me. I I don't want to keep taking medicine that's gonna hurt me. Right. If it's gonna hurt my liver or my kidneys, no, I don't want to take it. If it's gonna hit my lungs, no, I don't want to take it. If it's gonna hurt my heart, no, I don't want to take it. If it's gonna cause me to have cancer, or it's gonna cause me to have cancer in my prostate, no, I don't want to take it.

palmi 18:38

That affects all medications, right? I see a lot of those medication devices, seems like can't cause this, can't cause that, can't cause other stuff. Yeah, but uh they they don't tell you that cure to cure your tongue fungus or whatever, you know. It's like not that they're a thing.

Speaker 2 19:01

They don't tell you that over time, like 10 years or five years, this will happen to you. They don't tell you that. They just tell you what's it gonna do for you right now, right? I want to know what it's gonna do to me in five years. I want to know what's gonna do to me in ten years.

palmi 19:19

Okay, Danny, I'm gonna dad at this time, but uh I just thought of something as well as looking here at my contact boss, but you listened, Danny Rones. You have your own Facebook page.

Speaker 2 19:36

Well, I don't use uh Facebook or anything anymore, but you want to ask me about it, go right ahead.

palmi 19:42

No, I was just gonna say if you don't mind, I'll take your picture off your Facebook page. Okay. Because our web page has a little like picture in your neighbor can put it to guest.

Speaker 2 19:58

Okay, and that's what you want to do. Sure. It's a it's an old picture, but uh I I had a picture of me, and I also had a picture of my family on Facebook. I don't use Facebook anymore, I don't use no social apps anymore. Cool.

palmi 20:19

You're a better man than I. Sometimes I find myself just using uh apps because everybody else is. I don't want to see what the buzz is all about.

Speaker 2 20:33

Well, I can't say that I'm not lonely and that I I would want to have a wife to be with me, but if I get a wife, then I can't be on the TBL waiver anymore because disabled people ain't supposed to have family, they ain't supposed to have a wife. You got family, but you can't have a wife, you can't get married.

palmi 20:57

Yeah, no, you're supposed to be poor and for the rest of your life, right?

Speaker 2 21:02

Yes, that's what they say. But I'm not gonna do that.

palmi 21:06

I think I think we've done a podcast on that. There's a dis what we term a disability of charge. Yeah, if you get some sort of benefit or program that actually does help you, there's other things are taken away from you. So it's like you're mentioning when you choose to look for your benefits. Well, which benefit is most important to me?

Speaker 2 21:42

Yeah, but you have no choice. Yeah, I can say because you're disabled, you can't do this, you can't do that, you can't work, you can't go to college. And if you go to college, who's gonna pay your bills? And if you go back to work, who's gonna pay your bills? Because you you don't get any well, you get half the medical. Medicaid and you get Medicare. You don't get Medicare any Medicaid anymore because you went back to work or you get half the Medicare. I can't do it. It's expensive living here in New York.

palmi 22:15

That really depends on where you live. Yeah, I know. Some place I think here in Missouri, you could work on Medicaid as long as you don't go above the poverty level.

Speaker 2 22:29

Yeah, and so then if you go above it, you have a spin down, right? Yeah. Well, and how can if you go above the poverty level, how can you pay the spin down? Well if you're working.

palmi 22:42

Well, you gotta have a good job. Now time out here, Danny. Yeah, that's true. You do need a good job. You know, one of these days, I'll meet somebody who's disabled, who's like showing weight, rich, you know, can afford everything they need, but I have yet to meet that person.

Speaker 2 23:07

Yeah, I me either. I uh if you're disabled and you're rich and you can afford everything, that's no problem. Yeah.

unknown 23:16

Yeah.

Why Stay In New York

Speaker 2 23:17

You can get the good doctors, you can get the good medication, good therapy, and pretty soon you're walking and everything else, and you're not disabled anymore. Like all the stars that got hit by a car or whatever, they're back on TV and everything. They get run over by a truck. They're walking and everything. Yeah. It's like nothing happened to them. Yeah. Because when they went to the hospital, they got the right medicines and they got therapy and everything, and they paid for everything out of cash. But they had lawyers that asked for the kind of money that they they needed.

palmi 23:57

That's right. Lawyers and their own doctors. Uh, if you remember during COVID, uh certain uh reality shows or whatever had you know, like COVID tests and stuff available, and they'd like test every day. And I'm like, I've never even seen the COVID test. You know, where are they getting these things? Well, as it turns out, you can get them if doctors prescribes them for you. Well, yeah, they got their own living doctor. Uh that's how they're getting them all every day, you know.

Speaker 2 24:43

Well, I just took two COVID tests and I don't want to take any more. I had to take the two in order to see the doctors, and I took those two to see the doctors. In order to go to the VA, you had to take two COVID tests. So I took those two tests, those two shots, so I could see doctors. And every time that they asked me for my card, I pull out my card and show them that I took my COVID test and I could do whatever I need to do.

palmi 25:11

See, I think uh New York was hit more severely than we are here in rural Missouri, because I never had to show anyone that I had a shot. But I still got them because when you go to a lot of these hospitals or doctors or whatever, uh some people in there are like immunocompromised and stuff, and they can't take shots and they basically you're you're gonna basically get whoever they run into with something, you know. So I was more concerned about giving it to someone than catching it. But what the heck? Um I wanted to point out that Medicaid is different in every state.

Speaker 2 26:10

Yes, it's different in every state.

palmi 26:12

Yeah, and so is the cost of living, I believe. If I'm not mistaken, now you said you live in upstate New York, right?

Speaker 2 26:22

Well, they consider Westchester upstate New York, yes.

palmi 26:27

Okay, well, as I understand it, isn't New York today like the most expensive place do I still live?

Speaker 2 26:38

Westchester and further up is well Orange County, Walkin County, Warrington County is expensive, Westchester County is expensive, uh the Bronx is not, uh Brooklyn is not. Uh it depends on where you go here in New York. Because I have Section Eight and right now I'm only paying $238.

palmi 27:14

Which is real, real a lot less than I expected for for New York, to be honest.

Speaker 2 27:23

Uh Section 8 pays the rest of the money. I don't pay any money, so I don't worry about it. And the Department of Health pays my Con Ed bill. They pay $73 to 33 of the bill, and they asked me to pay $37, and I pay it. I don't care.

palmi 27:41

Oh good. Okay, you mentioned that you wanted to own your own business again. Do you wanted to go back to the same business, or do you have another business in mind?

Speaker 2 27:54

Uh well, I I have to see what uh society wants now. I know what they wanted when I was younger, but now it's a whole different thing.

palmi 28:06

True.

Veterans Care And Second Opinions

Speaker 2 28:07

So I have to find out what they want, and then I have to give it to them because at the time when I was younger, all I did was history for anybody. Or I did family photos, or I did uh when they had a funeral, I did funeral stuff, but I don't know if they'll still pay for that kind of stuff. Some people will, some people won't.

palmi 28:35

You mentioned that you're a vet. How long has it been since you've been in?

Speaker 2 28:42

Well, I I I've been a vet uh for 10 years now, 12 years now. Uh, but I didn't go overseas, so they don't want to give me everything because I didn't go overseas. I was a nurse at the VA hospital.

palmi 28:59

Right. Okay. Did they allow you to get uh rated on your TBI?

Speaker 2 29:08

Yeah, I I I uh can see any doctor at the VA hospital that I want to see. Cool. Because I got an honorable discharge, right? But I can't buy a house. There's a whole bunch of stuff. I don't I can't get uh benefits from the VA because I didn't go overseas. So if most people get a secondary income from the VA because they went overseas, but I can't get that because I uh there's nothing wrong with me besides the TBI, and I didn't get that from going overseas.

palmi 29:46

Yeah, I don't understand why that is. That might be somehow connected to a New York thing. I've never heard of if you've never been overseas, you can't have a uh Well, that's what they say here in New York.

Speaker 2 30:02

I don't know. I don't know. That's what they say here in New York. You can't have this, you can't have that. I'm like, okay, I just go along with it.

palmi 30:18

That's a good attitude to have, Danny. It's really uh remarkable that you stay so positive. And he tips for everybody else who needs it to improve on their positivity.

Speaker 2 30:36

You can get depressed if you want to, but all that does is change you. Either life changes you or you change life. You have to do something for yourself, you have to decide what you want to do and do it. Because if you don't, then you get depressed and you get uh anxiety from because not doing anything, so it's up to you what you want to do because depression and anxiety is gonna be there, or you could say, Well, no, I don't want that, and I want to do something else. It's up to you.

palmi 31:14

It's a good point, and it's uh uh point I think a lot of people should ponder because there is a lot of depression and disability circles, you know.

Speaker 2 31:29

Yes, I know. I I was I can't say that I wasn't depressed because I was when I first woke up, I was depressed. I couldn't understand why I was in a wheelchair now. I was I was hurt, yeah. But it wasn't changing, it wasn't changing anything. I was depressed for quite a long time. I was I had a lot of anxiety for quite a long time, I was angry for quite a long time. That didn't change anything. I was still in a wheelchair, so I decided, okay, well, I'm gonna make myself better. Because it ain't changing anything unless I make myself better. The doctors don't care. My family members don't care. They say, okay, you you're disabled now, you need to be in a wheelchair. No, I that's not what I want to do for the rest of my life. So uh that's up to me. I have to tell people what I want for the rest of my life, what I want to do for the rest of my life. Because as far as they're concerned, you're disabled now, so you belong in a wheelchair. You can't help yourself. We're gonna help you, and we're gonna tell you what to do. You know how depressing that is when people tell you what to do? Yeah, I know a lot about that, actually. Um you get tired of people telling you what to do, telling you what to eat, telling you when to sit, telling you when to go to the doctor. Telling you what to wear. You're not wrong.

palmi 33:00

You're not wrong. But we like to keep positive attitudes. I said about about that.

Speaker 2 33:12

Generality get bad, or you know. I told people, no, you can't tell me what to do. You ain't God. God tells me what to do, not you. And I'm gonna tell myself from now on what to do. And they didn't like that, they got very upset with me.

palmi 33:30

Well, um I have just one more question for you. If you could have any job you feel you're able to do, what job would you want?

Mobility Journey And Medications

Speaker 2 33:43

Well, right now I'm I use a cane, so I I would have to sit down at a desk, so I could be uh uh AI security or AI something, because that's the newest thing. Sure. Or maybe uh I could own a business and tell people what what to do. Yeah, because pretty soon I ain't gonna be none but robots and they gotta be fixed. So I'll be right there to fix them and tell them what to do when they break down.

palmi 34:23

Yeah, um, I have an idea for you. I'll explain after the interview. I don't want to uh if this works out great, I'll recommend it on the third episode on another episode where uh I'll give you a call back and we'll we'll talk about it. But I I don't wanna say something and waste everybody's time, okay. You understand what I'm coming from? Okay. Okay. It was really nice talking to you, Danny. Okay.